The Stormy Present – Society

Apparently Reverend Al Sharpton is mad at sports writer Steve Serby because Serby wrote an article in the New York Post in which he said, “Good for Tom Coughlin. Good for Coughlin tightening the noose around Plaxico Burress.” Serbry wrote this statement in response to Coughlin and the Giants fining and benching Plax for the various team infractions he regularly commits.

Rev Sharpton described that statement as, “blatant racism” and added that it amounted to a “media lynching.”

Look, we could go round and round about Coughlin and Plaxico and the relationship between old school coaches and new school players and which is better and who is in the wrong and so on and so forth. But that really isn’t the issue of importance.

The real issue of importance is that Rev Al Sharpton is doing a disservice to the black community.

I know that is a strong statement, but I honestly believe that in this case it is true. And I also know that Rev Sharpton has a long and distinguished history of aiding the African American community in their plight. Indeed, he’s aided people of all races who’ve needed a helping hand. I’ve never met the man, but he seems like a genuinely nice guy. And his speech at the 2004 Democratic Convention was nothing short of stirring. If it weren’t for Senator Obama’s speech at that convention (the one that launched him into the public eye), Rev Sharpton would have been the shinning star of that event.

However, in this instance, Rev Sharpton’s action is to the detriment of the advancement of racial equality. Serby is a sports writer and sports writers these days are the worst in history when it comes to using hyperbole to describe sporting events (see what I did there; using a hyperbole to make a point about hyperboles?) A star player acting like a diva and his exasperated coach punishing him is sadly fairly commonplace in today’s sports world. And for that reason, I imagine, Serby felt that he had to use inflammatory language and ‘no-holds-bar’ opinions to make his writing stand out. Inflammatory in the sense that he’s using the ‘noose’ metaphor because it is more striking and hardcore-seeming than using a Ward and June Cleaver phrase like, ‘laying down the law’. To be clear, I’m not excusing that sort of ratings-first, shock journalism (sports or political) because I hate that strain of writing. Jim Rome and the folks on Around the Horn can take a flying leap for all I care because rather than trying to raise the level of journalism they are simply trying to say something outrageous in order to get noticed.

Despite Serby’s apparent membership in the brotherhood of loudmouthed, empty-headed journalism, I do not think he meant his statement in a racist way. Michael Wilbon (who is black for those of you who didn’t know) defended him on PTI by saying that he’s friends with Serby and knows his mind and worldview and therefore knows that Serby is not a racist. I take Wilbon at his word; Serby isn’t a racist. Moreover, I don’t think Serby used that metaphor to purposely create a mental image of a white coach hanging a black player. I don’t think that because if you read the actual article, Serby doesn’t come off as someone that is so exceptionally smart that he purposefully used that metaphor to inflame people and therein get attention. I’ll bet that if you go back through all of Serby’s writings and all of Wilbon’s or any other major sports writer’s works, you’ll find that they’ve said something to the extent of ‘the noose in tightening around (some player/manager/owner/team/etc.’

So I don’t think Serby was being consciously racist or even trying to fan the flames of racism just to garner attention. I think this is just a matter of poor and lazy writing in which the author used a metaphor that can be applied to some things but failed to realize that when applied to this particular situation, it had negative connotations.

This get’s us to Rev Sharpton. He described Serby’s statement as “blatant racism.” I’m a smart guy, but I wouldn’t have put the pieces of the puzzle together to realize that a white coach is tightening a noose on a black player. So either I’m so racially evolved that I no longer see color (a la Stephen Colbert) or the statement isn’t “blatant”. Now, if you really look hard at the statement, you can find racist connotations. But to say it’s blatantly racist implies that it’s obviously racists and I just went through all the reasons why I think Serby isn’t racist and the perception that he is racist is the result of him accidentally using an unfortunate metaphor. So it might be unconscious or unintentional racism, but it certainly isn’t “blatant racism.” The fact that no one caught on to the fact that the statement could be construed as racist prior to the article being published proves that the racial slight was not obvious and therefore was not a case of “media lynching”.

The trouble with Rev Sharpton ignoring all of this in order to make a big deal about Serby’s statement is that I think, for all the reasons I’ve mentioned, that Serby did not intend for his statement to be racist. Serby is not, I don’t think, someone that is standing in the way of the advancement of racial equality. He’s not a Klan member, he’s not someone that refuses to associate with black people, he’s not someone that is full of misconceptions and stereotypes regarding black people. And I believe that most people share my belief on this. Thus, by demanding that Serby be fired, Rev Sharpton is setting himself in opposition to the way most people see this issue. Hence, he will undoubtedly be seen by many people as blowing this thing way out of proportion. Many will assume that he’s doing so for personal gain (ie to keep him in the news and assert his position as the defender of the interests of African Americans). As such, he’ll be seen by many people in a comical light; as nothing more than a man searching high and low for anything that might be conceived as racist if you twist the words in a certain order. He’ll be seen as someone who is constantly offended and perpetually victimized.

This is a disservice to African Americans because the fact of the matter is that there are plenty of actual cases of racism that Rev Sharpton should be seeking to bring to light. However, if he is perceived as someone that makes mountains out of molehills, someone that plays the victim over and over again, then people will be less likely to take what he says seriously even if it is the case that he actually has grounds to be offended. He becomes the boy who cried wolf, and in doing so becomes less effective as a spokesman for the plight of African Americans and for the advancement of racial equality.

I leave you with this final thought.

I feel like this article has brought up some interesting issues, which I’d love to discuss in the comment section. I feel like anyone who knows me knows that I care about poverty and racial equality a great deal and would love to discuss those in the comment section. I feel like I’ve done my part to raise awareness (on this site and its earlier incarnation) to raise awareness about issues dealing with poverty, inequality, injustice, and racism (incidents like the Jena 6, which I wrote extensively about on the old website). And I’d love to talk about any of that in the comment section because all of those things are serious and important topics that deserve our attention.

However, twice in this article I’ve used the word, “boy”. The first time is in the title, “Oh Boy, Here We Go Again.” Since the article is about Rev Sharpton, one could, through twisted logic, argue that in the very title of this piece I’m referring to Rev Sharpton as “Boy”. As in, “Oh [Al Sharpton], Here We Go Again.” Of course if this were my intent, it would be racist of me to refer to a black man as ‘boy’ because it denotes the idea that Rev Sharpton does not have the maturity of a full grown man and because slave owners and folks in the segregated South used the term ‘boy’ as a derogatory reference to black men. The second time I use the word “boy” is when I compare Rev Sharpton to “the boy who cried wolf.” This one is more BLATANT in that in the metaphor, Rev Sharpton is the boy.

I am not a racist. But if a reader of this article really wanted too, they could twist my words into something that might be perceived as such. So now it is up to you, the reader, do you choose to comment or think about the points I’ve made throughout the article or do you opt to comment or think about how my words might somehow be manipulated into racist statements?

Beer is an important part of every man’s life. So I’ll make this short and simple. What’s the best beer you’ve ever had?

List a couple of your top selections. We will then collectively either make fun of your choices and ultimately suggest that you’re the sort of person who drinks Zima with a jolly rancher and/or skittle in it OR we’ll remain vigilantly on the lookout for the tasty brew that you’ve endorsed.

Here’s my top notch selections in no particular order.

RJ Rockers Patriot Pale –> RJ Rockers is a micro brewery in Spartanburg, SC. They used to have a restaurant with the micro brewery in it, but now they just distribute their beers to area bars. Patriot Pale is the best Pale Ale you can get off the tap. Plus, it has a high alcohol content (if you catch my drift).

Dixie Beer –> I’ve only ever seen it in New Orleans and there abouts. I’ve also only had it in bottle form. Nevertheless, it has a taste that sits between Bud Lite and Budweiser (aka Bud Diesel). So it has the feel of a man’s beer, but isn’t filling. I list it among my top beers because it’s the sort of local brew that I could see myself drinking regularly.

Shiner Bock –> German immigrants living in Texas made this beer 100 years ago. It’s bitter and puts hair on your chest but if you’re eating Mexican food there is nothing better than cooling your mouth off with a big swig of Shiner. Plus, Robert Earl Keen Jr mentions it in a song.

Black Label –> Probably my favorite beer of all. It tastes great. Not a lite beer, but not filling and with a high alcohol content. It’s a working man’s beer. And on top of all that, the label proudly declares, “Black Label: America’s Lively, Lusty Beer.” How many times have you thought to yourself, ‘This beer is good but it comes off as too prudish; if only I had a beer that was more lusty’? Well search for a beer that likes to party and have promiscuous sex no longer, because Black Label is it. Oddly, I’ve only seen America’s lively, lusty beer in South Africa. Obviously this is disappointing as I consider it to be my beer of choice out of all the adult beverages world wide.

But hey, I’ve got pretty pedestrian tastes, so list some of your favorite beers in the comment section.

I came up with a new skit for Saturday Night Live. It’s about a TV show that has sucked for years and then fortuitously stumbles upon a really funny bit. But they then proceed to overuse this bit and use their new found popularity to get more TV exposure. The only problem is that at heart the show still sucks and the really funny bit is starting to wear thin. I call this skit “Can’t Leave Well Enough Alone.”

I’ll be the first to admit that even though I don’t like the current head writer for SNL, Seth Myers, I got excited for this season after the initial Tina Fey as Sara Palin skit. But if you watched the show beyond that season opener (when Sara Palin and Hillary Clinton gave a joint press conference) the show was terrible. The following week you had another Sara Palin skit (the interview with Katie Couric) and again beyond that the show was shit. Then the Vice Presidential debate gave more fodder for yet another Sara Palin. And all this Tina Fey greatness somehow got confused with an SNL resurgence. So NBC decided to give Seth Myers and SNL a Thursday night spot for 30 minutes right after Office up until the election. As if I didn’t already have enough reasons to wish this damn election was already over, now I’ve got to suffer through 10 minutes of good jokes forced into a 30 minute show.

And I know I’ve been complaining about poor quality TV a lot recently, but this goes beyond that. When SNL was good, and there were times when it was really great, it was doing edgy stuff that pushed the envelope. Or it was doing stuff that was irreverent, stuff that only people that really enjoyed comedy got. Now, the show is basically like the fictional version of SNL portrayed on 30 Rock. They are run by corporate higher ups that rely on focus groups to tell them what’s funny and their main concern is to make money, which makes them risk averse. So no edgy stuff, no complex stuff. Instead, SNL constantly chases trends by trying to copy comedy stylings they saw on the internet and by having guest hosts that aren’t going to be good at comedy, but are recognizable to teenagers.

The bottom line is SNL is the marquee name for sketch comedy. But they have turned into something akin to a corporate record label. They say, “Hey, we got a hit with this song/sketch so just keep copying that song/sketch.” Unfortunately, the result of that is that the show becomes entirely formulaic. My point is, SNL should stop going to the well over and over again. Dig a new well. Do something I haven’t seen before. Make the amateurs on YouTube look like amateurs instead of producing skits that make those two Chinese guys that lip sync to pop songs look like they’re talented enough to be writers for SNL. Stop chasing trends, defy them and thereby create new trends.

I’ll stop now before I get going too much. But this problem goes beyond SNL. All entertainment is now geared in the same way that SNL is. And as a result people like me, that is to say people who are not between the ages of 5-17 and possess a brain, have to put up with subpar entertainment. Even politics follows suit, which probably explains why everything is as fucked up as it is.

I know this is a bit of a rant, but think about how SNL used to be and how influential it was and then compare that to today’s incarnation of the show and how it is still influential but in a detrimental way. That’s not to say that SNL is the root of evil, just that it is an excellent representation for it.

I was listening to the Dave Matthews Band Live at Red Rocks cd from 1995 and starting thinking about what is the best concert I’ve ever been too. So I’ll recount my own best concert experience and then ask that you do the same.

I’ve been to many concerts and most of them were Dave Matthews Band concerts (or Dave and Tim shows). And while all of them have been good and most of them have been great (the July 4 show at Virginia Beach with my lady friend and the Charlotte shows [particulary ’96 and ‘98] were absolutely amazing), there is one show that was not only amazing but also involved a crazy tale so I give it top billing.

I went to grad school in Brighton, England from ’05-’06 and found out that Dave Matthews was playing a show by himself in London. Unfortunately, he was playing at the King’s College student bar (by the way, every college in England has a student bar on campus, which is freaking great), which held a mere 150 people and ticket priority went to people that were members of the British chapter of the Warehouse (the DMB fan club). So all the tickets went to those people and a few lucky members of Warehouse not from Britannia. I was not one of those lucky few.

Nevertheless, the day of the concert I took the train from Brighton to London (an hour long ride) and arrived outside the venue a solid 5 hours before the show in the hopes that someone would scalp me a ticket or that the venue would be kind enough to sell tickets to the first 50 or so people who couldn’t get them online. I was first in line by myself for about 3 hours. Then some folks started to pitch up and they all were trying the same thing I was. This meant competition, which would drive up the scalper’s price. Sure enough a scalper showed up and all of a sudden he was charging like 200 British pounds for 2 tickets (at the time 1 pound equaled 2 dollars). And as devoted to DMB as I am, I’m also notoriously cheap. So I wasn’t about to blow $200 on one ticket.

As I started to give up hope, this dude from Louisiana showed up and saw my College of Charleston hat. He and I started talking and I told him my situation and that I was about to jet because it seemed like a lost cause. He then told me that he had three tickets because his two friends were supposed to join him but couldn’t make it. Southern hospitality being what it is, he offered me a ticket for free! Of course I insisted upon paying him face value ($50) and he accepted.

Not 15 minutes after procuring my ticket and basically being on top of the world reveling in my good luck, Dave Matthews himself showed up and went down the line of people shaking hands and getting his picture taken. So I got to shake his hand and take a picture with him (on the way home unfortunately, I left my camera at the train station and never saw it again. This was the only downer of the entire night).

The show itself was crazy. The only thing between me and the stage and Dave Matthews was the dude that gave me the ticket (I figured he should have the prime spot since he hooked me up). Dave talked a lot about a number of random things. He pointed out that he’d just gotten back from Africa and that in Botswana he was hanging out with his local guide who started singing and he really enjoyed the sound of it. So he proceeded to basically sing this Koi-San bushman song that ultimately became Eh Hee. He did American Baby after talking about how he loved the ideas that America was founded upon and how he wanted to go back to those ideas. I could go on and on, but suffices to say it was like an episode of VH1 Storytellers (what ever happened to that show) except I was there and no one was asking him stupid questions.

So the story about me getting into the show, combined with the fact that the show itself was extremely personal (there were only 150 to 200 people in the place and he spoke a lot and seemed at ease) made it the best concert experience I’ve ever had.

Now, what’s your best concert experience?

Last week The Dark Knight surpassed $500 million, putting it within $100 million of Titanic’s decade old grasp on the highest grossing film ever. Now, I have my share of problems with Titanic, mainly anything that is not between the scene where the iceberg is hit and the stern makes its final decent, so it is my humble opinion that Warner Brothers needs to take the luxury liner out of the top spot, for a few reasons.

First, it is always nice to have a change. We have all come to associate Titanic with the big Hollywood picture, the creme de la creme of filmmaking. Before I get bashed for that, let me explain: it was a ridiculously expensive film for the time, it was pushed back from its original release date, and when first released it didn’t make a ton of cash, it was a word of mouth movie. That’s nice and all, but really, it’s time for it to go. Both lead actors have made much better films in the decade after its release, lets focus on those instead of having their names attached to this old water-bucket.

Secondly, it would perhaps get James Cameron off his ass and making movies again. I know he is working on his ultra-secret Avatar project, but every interview he talks more about the technology he is using than the actual movie itself. Technology is fine James, but let us see the actual film sometime before the next decade. Also, the success of Titanic making Cameron a gabillionaire also effectively canceled what I think could have been one of the best action movies ever: True Lies 2. Yes, I said it. And if anyone wants to disagree over the near perfection of True Lies, I am open for debate.

Thirdly, Warner Brothers has no Fall movie. Harry Potter is gone until next year. Where oh where will the poor movie studio make its fall revenue? Do we really want to see Twilight be the biggest movie of the Fall? Good lord no. The studio has the potential for a perfect marketing strategy in the upcoming months too. When all the crap horror movies are being released, they only need to put up more Dark Knight commercials, with a tag line like this: “Why settle for cheap villains this Halloween?” Then flash the Joker and Two-Face. Boom, that finish line of being the highest grossing film (unadjusted for inflation, of course) is right there in their hands. 

It would also give Christopher Nolan the definitive reason to wait for a third one, if he makes it at all. He could wait and wait, without fear of the studio bringing in some Ratner-esque clone for a third movie. He and his brother could focus on the best possible story so we wont be disappointed. Hell, he could wait ten years and adapt Frank Miller’s The Dark Knight Returns, which we would all love to see. No?

And, finally, two things. One, it would erase all the crap Batman films that have come out in the past from our collective memory by solidifying Nolan’s Batman films as the definitive ones. And two, I would like to see Heath Ledger’s final film get that spot, because we all know without him, the movie wouldn’t have been half as good. And, then, to backtrack, by letting Nolan wait, he could come up with the most plausible, fan acceptable reason why the Joker isn’t in the third film.

And maybe then too all this Angelina Jolie talk will go away. Catwoman is boring. Always has been, always will be. Sorry Trey, them’s the facts.

Sundays kick ass TV-wise. You’ve got Dexter, Californication, True Blood (new show, but not bad) and Entourage (which has stopped sucking after last season). Anyway, once I got threw viewing all my shows I saw that something called Little Britain USA was coming on HBO after Entourage. I lived in England for a year and have heard of the Little Britain show and seen dvds of it for sale, and immediately jumped to the conclusion that this show was stupid.

Maybe I’m getting soft in my old age or maybe it’s because at 1:30am my faculties of reasoning are limited, but whatever the case may be I decided to watch Little Britain USA. This was a costly error on my part.

The show is absolutely retarded. It is just a series of skits in which one of the two dudes is dressed up in a lot of makeup and doing a ‘character’ that either has a funny accent, is gay, or makes strange faces.

Am I wrong or is it not 2008? Have we not gotten past the whole, ‘man dressed as a woman = funny’? Do we not demand more out of our comedy?

So English people, grow up because you’re ruining HBO. And don’t even get me started that show The Life and Times of Tim.

Halloween is a good time to express how far you are willing to go in order to make people laugh. And let it be known that I have always encouraged creativity. Last year I made a note on facebook describing some funny costume ideas, but this year the shit is going to a whole new level.

We are going to use this website to come up with the greatest costume ideas EVER.

Perhaps you are thinking, “But Trey, I want to be like everyone else and dress up like Sara Palin or as a hobo or just reprise my role as a sexy nurse/cat/witch/princess/etc”. But why do that when you can be original and funny? (Note: it is always acceptable, and in fact highly advocated by The Stormy Present, for a girl to dress up in the Princess Leia gold bikini outfit [even if it isn’t Halloween]). So here are some suggestions that I’ve got and I encourage everyone else to add other suggestions in the comment box. Together, we can compile a list of the great costume ideas EVER.

Tape boxes of cereal to you and stick knives in them; you are a serial killer (I’ve seen this one around more and more, so it might be played out)

Wear all black and tape gum, popcorn, candy boxes, a drink cup, a condom, and a condom wrapper to your shirt and pants; you are the floor of an adult movie theater.

Get your girlfriend to dress up like a brink and you wear overalls and go as a brink layer (if your girlfriend agrees to this, then she is THE ONE; marry her)

Wear a Yankees hat and a Red Sox shirt; you’re Dane Cook (I came up with that last year so maybe it is a little dated, but I still fucking hate that guy)

Wear the invisible man costume that Mr Miyagi made for Daniel-son in Karate Kid

Wear a bride dress and tape Fedex boxes and post cards and stamps to it; you’re a mail ordered bride

Draw a magnet on your shirt and then tape some baby chickens (perhaps those Peeps candy ones) to your shirt; you are a chick magnet

Wear all black and tape fluorescent poster paper to your back for a back drop, then listen to your ipod and dance around like a jackass; you are that annoying ipod commercial (I saw that on the internet and laughed)

Wear your normal cloths and then just wear a sign that says ‘nudist on strike’ (I like this one)

Wear a box around your chest covered with wrapping paper and a bow, then place a card on it saying ‘From: God, To: Women’; you are God’s gift to women (probably what I’m going with this year)

But the greatest costume idea EVER as far as I can tell is as follows:

Wear all red and ride a bike around; you are the menstrual cycle.

I rest my case. If you’ve got anything list it in the comment section.

For sale: Baby shoes, never worn.

That is what Ernest Hemingway came up with when a friend challenged him to write a complete story in only six words.  I’m now throwing down that same gauntlet to everyone at The Stormy Present.  Let’s see how we compare with the man himself.  How complete a story can we weave with only six words?  Here goes.  There are no limits on how many stories you submit.

Cubs fan, need I say more?

Let’s face the fact that everyone who reads this website has embraced their inner nerd. So we all read and in fact some of write (look, I’m writing right now). Given our reading prowess and the fact that we haven’t written anything on the society page in weeks I figured we should do a Top 5 Authors list.

So just list, in order, your top 5 favorite authors of fiction. I limit this to fiction because as an uber-nerd if we include non-fiction academic stuff I can’t narrow the list down to 5. However, you are encouraged to get creative and include in your list scriptwriters for movies or TV shows or songwriters and the like. So think outside of the box and write a sentence or two to justify your picks.

Here’s my list (with accompanying links in case you are inspired to investigate my claims):

5. Chinua Achebe –> Really he makes the top 5 based entirely on one book, Things Fall Apart. That book easily makes the top 5 of best books I’ve ever and as much as I hate to admit this and use a cliché, it probably did change my life. There is a sequel to Things Fall Apart called No Longer at Ease. It’s not bad, but doesn’t measure up to the original. And Man of the People is a beautiful story about how entirely screwed up African politics is as told through characters that resemble the ones in Things Fall Apart. Plus, I’ve seen this guy speak in person!

4. F. Scott Fitzgerald –> As you will see with this and my other picks, I wish I lived during the 1920s. The Great Gatsby really is a simply brilliant book. Basically any story ridiculing the opulence of rich people and their greed and status seeking is going to score big with. He’d rank higher on the list, but essentially all his books are about the same theme that I just mentioned.

2. George Orwell –> Yes, I skipped 3. I had too because I can’t break the tie between Orwell and Steinbeck. Everybody knows about 1984 and Animal Farm, but I implore you to check out Down and Out in Paris and London. That is one of my favorite books. Orwell lives a life of poverty in Paris in London to expose the plight of the poor. Maybe that doesn’t count as fiction, but for the love of God it is amazing writing full of simple tales that have immeasurably deep meanings. And it is as funny as it is important. Also, his short editorial pieces are always excellent.

2. John Steinbeck –> I read The Pearl when I was a kid, I read Of Mice and Men in high school, I read The Grapes of Wrath as a freshman in college, and I read Cannery Row in between college and grad school. Every one of those books is great. But when you get right down to it, Grapes of Wrath is nothing short of eye opening and inspiring in its sadness. If you can read that book and not come away wanting to fight against the system, I don’t know what to tell you. Seriously, for about 6 months after reading it I considered changing my name to Tom Joad and starting a rebel army. No one ever wrote about the plight of the working man better than Steinbeck.

1. Ernest Hemingway –> He has been my favorite writer since 7th grade when I read The Old Man and the Sea. His writing is perfect. I appreciate simplicity. But I recognize that the world is complex. Anyone that can capture the complex world in simple writing. With simple stories. Is, in my estimation, the greatest writer ever. (See what I did there? Aren’t I funny?). And of course For Whom the Bell Tolls is great, but his short stories are a thing of fucking genius (The Short Happy Life of Francis Macomber is my favorite). And most importantly, his life is essentially how I’d like my life’s narrative to be (minus the suicide and multiple divorces). He traveled to Africa, did daring things, constantly sought to find adventure and misadventure, and was kind of an asshole that didn’t mince words and just did what he wanted. If Hemingway isn’t the picture of greatness, I don’t know what is.

So there’s my list, now leave your in the comment box. I look forward to reading them.